It seems that every day I wake up (or in my case, go to bed AS people are waking up) and find new stories in how people are either insulting their intelligence, rights, or just generally pissing others off.
I mean… is this what we do? Was this originally part of our job description? Eat, shit, breathe, and piss people off. Add in the occasional act of procreation or even the hopeful act of denied-but-pleasurable procreation for us… maybe even hopeful-but-still-denied procreation for people like me who have very little choice but to content with self-gratification… but still… piss people off.
Part of our DNA? What will we find when we unravel that mystery? A greasy bloke named DAN who looks like a constellation comprised of lines connecting the sequences of DNA who will tell us that no, we haven’t in fact found out the secrets and answers to being human and would we please give him two hundred bucks as a loan, he’d like to jump out of the computer and big fucking microscope so he can steal our girlfriend and take her on a night on the town as well as sleep with her before the particles in his tiny ass strand all fall out of alignment and he goes to that great big DNA haven in the sky…
K-Mart. It’s where the bad genes go. Jeans. Genes. Fuck it.
So I wake up at one point on a daily basis and there’s always some way, some thing, anything about something you hear that feels more like it was put there or that you heard about it for the sole intention of either pissing you off or just insulting your intelligence… if you have some. If you don’t, go back to bed.
[url=http://www.smh.com.au/news/world/new-zealand-outlaws-smacking-of-children/2007/05/16/1178995227390.html]Like New Zealand blocking the right[/url] to smack your children. Okay. So some adults go too far… some don’t. Some don’t go far enough and they give their little brat so much freedom to do whatever the fuck they want that it makes you just want to beat them with a spoon. A blunt fucking spoon, and if you do this, you’re committing a crime. Well, that’s irrelevant now because so are the adults, so now some of these parents are going to have to learn to take their kids’ Nintendo’s, Sony’s, and booze & condoms away to convince their 8 year old that no, you can’t have that fucking lollipop and what the fuck were you doing offering a blow job to that man in aisle four.
Okay, so I’m going over the top here. But the right to parent your kids should be your right and while some people can go too far in smacking kids, more often than not, it’s a light way of saying “wake up, this ain’t your world” to the kid. Mind you, my mind is still not made up in regards to what I’d do for smacking my kids. It’d probably be something gruesome and terrifying… like being forced to sit through [url=http://imdb.com/title/tt0118661/]The Avengers[/url]… or listen to a Barry Mannilow CD.
And then there’s this.
[url=http://www.smh.com.au/news/biztech/open-source-infringes-our-patents-microsoft/2007/05/15/1178995139197.html]Microsoft are pissing people off again.[/url] Do you remember how Microsoft were snapping up patents left, right & center for pretty much every piece of technology Windows or any other operating system, device driver, and anything else computer based has ever used? They’ve been doing it for the past year or so so if you haven’t been told, you have now. Well, now it seems open source software like Linux infringes on their patents.
Bastards. This was the plan the entire time.
Sure, open source is a threat to how you make money because the open source software — the free software — is often better than the stuff you charge us for, but now you figure you’ll make money off of the people nice enough to not charge us. Well for that, you earn the greedy gold star, motherfuckers.
[url=http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,899098-1,00.html]And how about the fucking free sex movement?![/url]
I mean come on! Why the hell wasn’t I invited?! Shit, anyone would guess through reading [i]one[/i] of my blogs how sexually dependent and yet how strangely sexually lacking I am at the same time… shit, where’s [b]my free sex movement[/b]?!
I’m just too annoyed to comment on that one.
But I will comment on this one because this next one is just stupid.
[b]The news stories pegged it as the depressed kid… he’ll never work again… he’s been mentally destroyed and it’s all the school’s fault.[/b]
Yeah. Boo hoo fucking bullshit. [url=http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2007/05/14/1178995042035.html]He sits in his room all day and plays Playstation 2.[/url] He’s not mentally destroyed, he’s just fucking lazy.
Shit, I got beaten up and mentally battered by bullies when I went to school too. My younger brother had to more or less stand up for me. One of the schools did nothing about it. Bellevue Public School, no doubt filled with Satan’s lazy-ass minions, refused to take my Dad’s complaints that no one would do anything about my bullying, but shit… I’m not mentally tortured. Hell, sometimes I actually do some work.
I’m not saying that it’s impossible to be mentally damaged from being bullied. It’s not. It happens to a lot of people. It can happen to anyone. Anyone can be a victim.
But not this kid. He’s fucking lazy. That’s the excuse.
After getting all of that bullshit off of my chest, [b]there’s even stuff that affects me personally.[/b]
Today, I got called up by a stranger to tell me that my cat had been found. Shit. I didn’t know he’d been lost. I’d seen him yesterday, but apparently he was outside a flat with his collar nearby. Well that [i]is[/i] weird since yesterday was the day I’d since seen him and he’d decided to remove it. I trusted that he’d lose it and another ten bucks went down the drain. Not so.
Now, you might consider that good news, but just wait.
Before I let him back out again, I’ll venture out to K-Mart to get him a new tighter band he hopefully can’t remove. Also, I’d like to see some of his wounds heal. You see, Vivaldi is a fighter. I don’t know why, mind you, as based on the amount of wounds he has all over him, he seems like he’s not the most successful of the fighters out there. But still, he doesn’t listen to me and still seems content to fight and get scabbier.
Well, tonight he’s been sleeping on my lap. That’s very sweet and very comfy. He’s also been sleeping on my desk. That’s very cute. It’s like having a new peripheral for your computer, but it’s incredibly useless and takes up half of your desk. Like a USB vacuum cleaner or something.
At points he’s also been sitting on my desk in front of my monitor which has made using my computer for the work I do and for writing this blog quite difficult. Anyway, a few minutes ago he was sitting there and started scratching at his scabs.
And then I noticed the flecks. I noticed the specks. I saw the flecks and specks of blood that he was forcing onto my nice LCD I’d only so recently gotten and you know, it figures that bad stuff has to happen to me. Me, I help people, animals, everyone… and still I get no jobs, girls, random sex, or bits of respect. And now, to add to it, my nice new monitor was getting fight blood on it. Brilliant. I had to try and scrape it off with the piss-all fingernail that I have and I’m seriously hoping that it doesn’t leave scratches on the display. I don’t think it has but his blood must be mixed with quick-dry glue or something.
[b]But then, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.[/b]
The light — as dim as it is — provides some sense of “oh don’t worry, so you’re not getting laid… here’s some fate on a plate” or something else to that effect. This week, [url=http://www.smh.com.au/news/world/voice-of-moral-majority-stilled-but-others-keep-up-the-cry/2007/05/16/1178995237305.html]the Reverend Jerry Falwell has met his maker[/url]. And while “death” is never actually a good thing, occasionally it makes us feel a bit better. I mean really, when Saddam Hussein got executed, how many people who’d never been affected by his deeds (by his I mean his, not acting on someone acting for him… like Mr. Bush) breathed a sigh of relief before letting go of whatever crept out of their bowels before wiping the slate clean with some Bin Laden toilet paper. That probably deserves a question mark, but it was more rhetoric since I know that we’ve all done it at one point.
Well, Mr. Falwell has that sort of reaction with me. It’s not a Christian thing. I like Christians. They taste like chicken. Seriously, I like Christians. I’m not bothered if you’re part of any religion. I actually like learning about religions… I just don’t want it pushed against me. And Falwell not only was a pusher, he was a hypocritical wanker that tried to speak for this “Lord” he talked so fondly of but always came out looking like a bigger wanker than the other wankers out there who were purportedly (and still are) speaking for this “Lord”.
Sadly, there’s a whole bunch more wankers like Falwell still out there. They’re still there, preaching to the masses who don’t have anything else to believe in and take their opinions so readily and freely.
Shit. There’s still a flake of blood. God damnit.