Christ… [url=http://blog.wired.com/games/2006/11/games_4_girls_a.html]some people just don’t get it[/url].
Well I see Bratz and That’s So Raven and Strawberry Shortcake and Cooking Mama and The Little Mermaid and Spyro!
Well gee golly (you stupid fucks in marketing), I do believe we’ve found a way (to piss off every girl on the planet) to make people happy!
I wonder what feminists really think of this shit.
Seriously… why the fuck are stupid marketing dweebs still given a license for what to do in marketing video games? Have they even seen a Nintendo DS or played any of these games?!
Hey… bright idea! Make the people who are planning to come up with ways of selling games play the fucking things before they come up with the campaign.
The only possible type of games for separate sexes that I can conceivably think of would be maybe “Harvest Moon Ovulation DS” for the girls and “Prostate DS” for the boys. Both would even be informative for either sex.
Hell, “Clit Hunter DS” would be a hit for boys my age. We’ve all been looking desperately for a way to find the bloody thing, someone may as well just stick it in a video game right there for us. And for girls too… don’t know where it is? Play with a friend and see if you can find each others’ clits wirelessly!
Oh and “I’ll show the boys what the girls can do!”… what the fuck is this? You’ll show the boys what the girls can do? The girls are just as good as the boys at playing the games because… survey says… ANYONE CAN PLAY ANY FUCKING GAME THEY WANT.
As for “I’ll show the boys what the girls can do!” followed by a giant blimp of a phrase “The Perfect Score”… The Perfect score? Seriously… what are you doing here.
You wanna know what “the perfect score” is? The perfect score consists of marketing idiots treating girls gamers like guy gamers and saying games are for people. People play games. I play Cooking Mama… does that mean I’m a girl? Well fuck me… my dick must have mysteriously changed into a clit without telling me! Now I can find out what The Perfect Score really is!
Wanna see my new purchase?! I bought it just so I could… find myself…
[img]https://www.leighlo.com/uploads/random/advancewhores.jpg[/img]
My apologies to Nintendo, the team who made Advance Wars DS (brilliant game by the way), and whoever this girl is… but this game could show someone what “The Perfect Score” is.
Seriously marketing marketers… why don’t you play the game first… you might be able to tout Cooking Mama for its unique style of game experience as opposed to basically condemning a game and the act of cooking to girls only and basically suggest that a game about cooking must be for girls since you seem to think that’s what girls do.
Likewise, Spyro. If I were Spyro, I’d be fucking pissed that you’re telling him what his audience is. And he’s a fucking dragon. He’s purple.
You do not mess with a purple fucking dragon.
Wanna mess with something? Try the game Advance Whores: Dual Schlong. You should see what the multiplayer orgy games look like.
Now that’s “the perfect score”.