The Industry’s Best Load Of Crap! (Well… maybe)

I put up my review of the DataWind PocketSurfer 2 today on Cyber Shack mostly because I got around to adding the paragraph since I'm writing a whole ton of reviews this week. Should be an Endless Ocean review written tomorrow and hopefully an Uncharted one by the end of the week.

Anyway, as I was linking through their site (as we do in all Cyber Shack reviews) I found a bit on their page that said "Click here to learn more about the world's best thumb keyboard". When you click there, you're greeted with a page telling you about "The Industry's Best Thumb Keyboard"… uh huh.
Sure… no offense DataWind but…

What the fuck?!

What reviewer said that? Please tell me so I can take their hands off of the dry ice block and throw them into a furnace… that'll give them feeling once again and they'll be able to feel with their very own sense of touch what is quite possibly one of The Industry's Worst Keyboards.

Seriously… while I still love the idea behind the PocketSurfer 2… it's an absolutely awful keyboard.

And what the hell? You're just stealing the Motorola Razr design with laser etched keys. How can you call your keyboard better if it actually has less tactile feedback than the Razr one (which actually IS decent).

It gets worse.

I quite like how you (DataWind) have highlighted for everyone the words "generous tactile response" in your little puff piece.

What "generous tactile response" do you speak of? The sort that doesn't exist or the piss-all feedback that exists on the few buttons.

Okay, sure… your keys are bigger. They're also crappier.

You can't just say something on your official webpage like "The Industry's Best" or "The World's Best" without having some sort of a quote from someone in the industry.

Go on. Find someone who'll say that about the PocketSurfer's keyboard who:

  1. Writes for a tech publication (either online or offline)
  2. Isn't related to anyone working at or associated with DataWind
  3. Isn't on the company payroll in any form.
  4. Isn't an amputee (I mean no offense to any amputees with this comment either).

If you can satisfy all of those with someone providing that quote, then maybe I can grant you that… but you can't make a statement like that on a page without any proof.

That's like me saying I have the best shorts in all the world. I'm sure there'd be a few people who'd want to know why.

Seriously, here are some of the things you say that I'd like some quotes for telling us that this is anything other than marketing crap:

  • "With generous tactile response, it makes thumb-typing fast, easy and error-resistant." — I think we've covered this one. Error-resistant my ass.
  • "It offers one of the fastest text entry mechanism, available in a handheld device." — Err… no.
  • "Power of a monster server in  the palm of your hand " – I'm going to have to say no to this.
  • "Real HTML  pages,  graphics, java  scripts….no compromises ! " – Sure, except for where it compromises on animation speed, graphic rendering, the inability to run simple forms on HTML pages…

Yes… the difference is obvious…

You're full of crap. Stop speaking in tongues, DataWind. I liked the concept, I still like the concept… but I hate your marketing BS. I really hate that sort of crap.

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