Low-cut jeans

One of my clients has given me some low-cut jeans.

These jeans are cut low at the waist… and… while I’m wearing them… I just don’t get it.

I mean why… why would anyone want to have a cut of jeans that specifically aims to show off their crack?

What sort of idiot in marketing or design one day went “Hmm… well, since jeans are all the rage… let’s try something completely unexpected. How about this… a pair of jeans where an inch or two is cut off from the height of the waist line so that no matter what happens, at all points someone can see part of your ass crack when they look at your ass!”

These pants bring new meaning to the word crack addict.

Hi. My name is Leigh and I’m a crack addict… and I’ve never taken an ounce of crack in my life… but by wearing these low-cut jeans… I feel like such a fucking crack addict that the rest of the world probably won’t be able to stop commenting on my crack.

Even wearing these boxer trunk thingies, you may not be able to actually see my crack… BUT I KNOW IT’S THERE!!!

Plus, they’re slim leg… which means they cling to my leg like ink-jet printouts and cum-stains cling to fourteen year old boys in the basements of their parents home in middle America. Jerk jerk, “Oh Sarah”, jerk jerk, new stain.

If anything, these new pants will kickstart me losing weight again.

New goal, Leigh… new goal: change your weight so you don’t look like such an idiot in these jeans.

For anyone that wants to see what I look like in low-cut jeans, our band will be playing at [url=http://www.thelansdowne.com.au/gigs.html]The Lansdowne[/url] at 7ish pm tonight.

Posted in ...and Everything
Write a comment