The Big Clit

I learned something tonight.

Tonight, I learned that the female clit (as opposed to the male clit) is actually the element of the human body that forms or grows into the male penis (as opposed to the female penis).

These “as oppose” off-the-cuff comments I’m making have a point, however, as I realised a couple of things when he told me this nifty factoid.

1. If the clit turns into the penis when humans are developing, does this theoretically mean that if a guy were to push his penis all up inside himself, he might find his own G spot?
If this is the case, are bisexual and gay guys going about it the wrong way (literally) by fucking each other up the arses when they could just be pushing each others’ cocks into each other in the hope that one of them will get off…?

I have no idea and I’m wondering if our federal government would mind donating money so we can conduct this important research…

And…

2. If the clit is actually what grows into the penis, then guys actually have clits…
And then guys with somewhat small penises have decent sized clits, average guys have over-sized clits, and huge guys over 7-8 inches have freakishly large clits. They should seek a doctor immediately.

Does this mean that as men we’re essentially lesbians prone to using our over-sized clits to penetrate women with more normal sized clits?

For this… I have no idea. I don’t like my chances of going up to random women and having me ask them if they’d mind me inspecting their clit to see if it’s an average size or not compared to their male counterparts. But it could be an epidemic… an epidemic of epidemic proportions where our men and women have clits the wrong size for each of them.

I’m rambling here because I’m probably brain dead at so many points. I’d ask my clit but he doesn’t care at the moment. He’s off looking at The Big Clit.

That’s right…The Big Clit

This is something I thought about tonight, or got to thinking about…

You see, Australia is known for having “big” things… it’s as if we’re obsessed with competing with Texas in our quest for “the biggest”… we’ve got The Big Banana, The Big Wine Cask, The Big Koala, and even The Big Hemorrhoid (which is known to be a pain in the ass and somewhat irritating).

What we don’t seem to have is… The Big Clit… until now that is.

Presenting The Big Clit, and who wouldn’t want to be seen cheering and being filled with love and other seminal fluids and juices at this national treasure of sorts… why you can walk inside and learn all about the wonders of the clit, order a milkshake, rub up against it, and make sure to bring the little ones because they can slide down the slippery clit!

In fact… Men, if you make your way to the clit without the use of a map or directions, guess what?! YOU’VE FOUND THE CLIT!
Claim a personal achievement of what most men can’t do.

Sadly, this dream of The Big Clit cannot happen because it seems Australia might already have one.

Oh, you don’t know it as The Big Clit, but it sort of already looks like one and it — like many a girl’s clits — is in a region as barren as any that men seem to know about but just don’t know what it’s there for.